Based on my in depth analysis (roughly 5 minutes on Google once I ought to have been folding underwear), the Chinese language zodiac system assigns an animal image to every 12 months. It’s believed that individuals born in a given 12 months have the persona of that 12 months’s animal. For instance, based mostly on the placemats at my favourite Chinese language buffet, I used to be born within the 12 months of the Canine, which suggests I’m loyal, trustworthy and troublesome to housebreak.
Though it has completely nothing to do with the Chinese language zodiac system, I’m hereby declaring this 12 months to be the 12 months of the Possum! The frequent possum (often known as the “opossum,” “roadkill” or “hissing rat-kitty”) is definitely a marsupial, that means that when possums really feel threatened, they hiss with a robust Australian accent. They vaguely resemble a small home cat who spent a drunken night time in town with a set of malfunctioning Norelco clippers.
“So why this sudden curiosity in possums?” you most likely aren’t asking. Throughout the previous two months, I’ve had two encounters with these repulsive, but someway endearing creatures.
The primary occurred one night final month whereas my spouse and I had been taking our night geriatric energy stroll. As we walked previous our home, we observed an unidentified bushy object on our entrance garden. At first, we thought it is perhaps a bunny, a kitten and even one among our household doglets who had escaped to the entrance yard to kill the remainder of our grass.
Upon nearer inspection (I made my spouse go look), we found that it was a younger possum – most likely a young person based mostly on the entire sighing and eye rolling. As a result of East Texas was experiencing document warmth and a drought on the time (and since I really feel a kindred connection to all creatures with dangerous hair) I made a decision to arrange the possum a small dish of water and a handful of kibble pet food.
After I returned with the meals and water, the possum gave me a half-hearted hiss and revealed in its clutches the carcass of a half-eaten rodent. In different phrases, I used to be like a type of restaurant servers who attempt to pressure a dessert on me after I’ve already stuffed myself. (I often conform to the dessert.)
My subsequent possum encounter occurred a month later when my spouse interrupted my slumber to tell me that there was a possum in our swimming pool/liquid money vortex. After I requested her if she obtained it out, she mentioned that she thought I ought to do it since she mainly does the whole lot else besides breathe for me. (I’m nonetheless attempting to determine find out how to flip that over to her, too.)
After I went outdoors, the possum was sitting simply inside one of many skimmer consumption thingies–judging me as a result of he didn’t like my bathrobe. There was no time to rethink my leisurewear, although, as I sprang into motion, utilizing the pole finish of my dip web to gouge the possum out of the skimmer after which skillfully twirling the pole to scoop him within the web and deposit him over the again fence – whereas chilly possum water streamed down my arm and into my gown.
Though these experiences weren’t altogether nice, it’s good to know that our neighborhood has a wholesome ecosystem that helps the native wildlife – even when it has no style in bathrobes.
Copyright 2023 Jase Graves distributed completely by Cagle Cartoons newspaper syndicate. Graves is an award-winning humor columnist from East Texas. His columns have been featured in Texas Escapes journal, The Shreveport Occasions, The Longview Information Journal, and The Kilgore Information Herald. Contact Graves at susanjase@sbcglobal.web.
